Angelica Cosgrove



Blossoms of hope

Losing myself in the muddle of life and navigating blindly through a wind-beaten wood was the only path to finding myself again. Whilst stumbling over unearthed roots and clutching at spindly, gnarled branches, I raised my chin and looked to the sky. The crescent moon smiled down at me, beaming with pride and the dancing stars sprinkled their kindness, gentle kisses in the sapphire darkness. Anorexic branches now appeared fruitful, overflowing with blossoms of hope and the callous debris softened and parted to become stepping stones inviting me into the unknown. 


The girl that dreamt too much

It was the third consecutive night she had woken up, piercing the balmy morning air with her scream.

“He was hovering over my bed Mum! He just left through the window!”

Pealing back the heavy, lilac curtain, her mother closed the open window, scanning the ground beneath. Meanwhile, her father stomped noisily around the house, into the attic, checking behind closed doors.

“There’s nobody here darling. It’s just a dream,” her mother soothed her, stroking her damp fringe out of her eyes.

“Then why did I feel and see ‘him’ as clearly as I can you?”

He had appeared above her and she had felt an overpowering sensation of heaviness in her limbs, eyes and mind. If succumbed to, this heaviness¬†would take her into unconsciousness, lazily drowning her in its poison. However, at the sight of the man she pulled back, resisting the urge to sleep, terrified for her safety. He lifted his hands, producing a powder and in her drowsiness she believed he was the dream catcher, who steals your dreams, your energy, your power. She fought; she wouldn’t let somebody be in control of her consciousness¬†in that way. She pushed her paralysed arms forward, shook her unmoving head from side to side and eventually gasped as her screeching broke the fear and he slipped out of the window, seen only by her.

Have you experienced sleep paralysis? What have your experiences been? I first started to experience it as a teenager. Despite many terrifying nights, where I suffered from this phenomenon and the accompanying hallucinations, I have taught myself that by remaining calm during an attack and by embracing the paralysis, I can turn the often negative experience into something extremely positive and enlightening. By using my sleep paralysis as a doorway, I can now separate my astral body from my physical body and I am learning to travel the astral plane, between the planets and the stars.

Henry Fuseli (1781) depicts the heavy sensation and hallucinations that accompany sleep paralysis beautifully. I’m sure I’ve had this demonic, Gollum-like creature sit on my chest during an attack.
Your spirit body leaves your physical body. #OBE
You feel like you are flying.
We are connected to the universe.

Nature frees her soul…

Barefoot with a heavy heart, she steps lightly through the open meadow, feeling comforted as the light bristles of sweet-vernal grass stroke her bare ankles. Absent-mindedly, she notices soft lilac and lemon petals, ox-eye daisies, childhood-friendly buttercups and wild dandelions, gently swaying in the soft, caressing breeze, so delicate, yet proud, standing tall on their thin stalks. Looking up at the sky, through the heavy, twisted branches of an oak, she blinks into the dappled light and knows to trust the Universe to consume her restless soul. Calmness envelops her mind in a deep embrace and as her last salty, bitter tear slowly slides down her sunken cheek, she finally allows her spirit to spread its cramped wings and to ride on the waves of the breeze.

– Angelica Cosgrove

Blog at

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: