Angelica Cosgrove


Spiritual awakenings

A reflection on the Universe and our place in it.

My sweet Bourgea

Throughout history, trees have developed a deep and sacred relationship with people. They have played significant roles in many mythological and religious beliefs, as well as cultural traditions, such as The Tree of Life, The Banyan tree in Hinduism, The Tree of Knowledge of Judaism and Christianity and the Bodhi tree of Buddhism. Living in Thailand, I am accustomed to seeing trees adorned with colourful ribbons, wrapped around their trunks. Many Thai people believe that trees, often the old and large ones, are home to spirits and so to keep the spirit calm and happy they deck the tree with ribbons and leave offerings at its roots. 

Tree believed to house a Spirit, on the pavement beside Charoen Krung Road, Bangkok.

It comes as no surprise to me then that when Tom and I chose a gorgeous Bourgainvillea for our garden from our local nursery, I immediately had a sense that she was special. Different to a spirit actually living in our plant, I believe our beautiful plant has her own innate spirit. The man who worked at the nursery, carried her down the stairs towards us, her blooms cheerfully bouncing up and down at every step and as ‘crazy’ as it may sound for thinking this, she just looked so happy to be coming home with us! Mother Nature certainly works her magic on me. 

Once home, awaiting my Bourgea’s arrival, I felt an overwhelming urge to prepare our wild and unruly garden for her. A little like an anxious host awaiting guests, I hacked at overgrown palm leaves, climbed terraces to reach spindly, unleafed branches and shuffled snail-laden pots around…with my six month pregnant tummy! Tom looked on at me like I was a mad woman. (He did of course help though!) 

Finally, my beautiful plant has a garden that is fit for her and she is now settled in perfectly just beside the patio door. Here I can admire her whilst sat in the lounge, finally having a well deserved rest! Dylan, my one eyed, rescued street cat, set straight to making her acquaintance, and even though he was a little rough at times (hanging off her branch), I have a funny feeling that my sweet Bourgea didn’t mind. 

Dylan meeting my sweet Bourgea for the first time.

Unicorns and spells…¬†

Sometimes, our souls crave the chance to wander free and to escape normality. Allow your mind to dream and to believe in the extraordinary; sprinkle that touch of magic over your reality, if only for a few minutes. It’s not madness; it’s necessary and healthy. 


Delta Waves

There’s nothing like a good night’s sleep – even if it’s the first in a year! Last night I listened to delta waves sleep music and oh my, did I sleep peacefully and deeply. I¬†hopped out of bed this morning¬†with an actual gleeful¬†yelp, and felt, I ¬†imagine, like how a lop-eared bunny midair binky feels; on top of the world. Anything is possible after a good night’s sleep!¬†If you have trouble sleeping, I really suggest trying out this 8 hour delta wave sleep music by Yellow Brick Cinema… mmm. Sweet dreams my friends.

The girl that dreamt too much

It was the third consecutive night she had woken up, piercing the balmy morning air with her scream.

“He was hovering over my bed Mum! He just left through the window!”

Pealing back the heavy, lilac curtain, her mother closed the open window, scanning the ground beneath. Meanwhile, her father stomped noisily around the house, into the attic, checking behind closed doors.

“There’s nobody here darling. It’s just a dream,” her mother soothed her, stroking her damp fringe out of her eyes.

“Then why did I feel and see ‘him’ as clearly as I can you?”

He had appeared above her and she had felt an overpowering sensation of heaviness in her limbs, eyes and mind. If succumbed to, this heaviness¬†would take her into unconsciousness, lazily drowning her in its poison. However, at the sight of the man she pulled back, resisting the urge to sleep, terrified for her safety. He lifted his hands, producing a powder and in her drowsiness she believed he was the dream catcher, who steals your dreams, your energy, your power. She fought; she wouldn’t let somebody be in control of her consciousness¬†in that way. She pushed her paralysed arms forward, shook her unmoving head from side to side and eventually gasped as her screeching broke the fear and he slipped out of the window, seen only by her.

Have you experienced sleep paralysis? What have your experiences been? I first started to experience it as a teenager. Despite many terrifying nights, where I suffered from this phenomenon and the accompanying hallucinations, I have taught myself that by remaining calm during an attack and by embracing the paralysis, I can turn the often negative experience into something extremely positive and enlightening. By using my sleep paralysis as a doorway, I can now separate my astral body from my physical body and I am learning to travel the astral plane, between the planets and the stars.

Henry Fuseli (1781) depicts the heavy sensation and hallucinations that accompany sleep paralysis beautifully. I’m sure I’ve had this demonic, Gollum-like creature sit on my chest during an attack.
Your spirit body leaves your physical body. #OBE
You feel like you are flying.
We are connected to the universe.

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